Family

The family’s visit is coming to an end . . . boo hoo . . . boo hoo . . . boo hoo.  I love my family so much.  This is why . . . .

 

We laugh until we can’t breathe.

 We make fun of the funny way Nana says things.

 I get my southern accent back – ya’ll.

 The cousins play and play and play and fight and make up and giggle.

 The cousins sing all their favorite “God” songs together (LOVE THIS!!!!).

 With my family, I’m not “The Pastor’s Wife”.  I’m just a wife, mom, baby girl, big sister, crazy aunt, and pesky sister-in-law. 

Even though we disagree on “stuff”, we talk animatedly about it and then move on.

We love each other fiercely in spite of our faults and quirks.

We belong.

Friendship

Why are friendships so hard?  Why do we judge and compare?  I was doing some reading today about friendship and several things struck me.

 

1.      We are not guaranteed or entitled to heart friends. They are gifts of grace from God.  We don’t deserve them. When we catch glimpses of this sisterly grace, we must receive it with deep gratitude. (I thought for many years that I deserved friends.  God has changed my thinking.)

 

2.      Friendship does not come easily. We tend to believe the myth that friendship should be easy or require little effort. It is neither.  It takes effort -HUGE effort.  (This means I have to invest, love, TRUST, communicate, be open . . . all of which are HARD.  It is easy to call someone a friend, but hard to actually be a friend.)

 

3.     We put parameters on our friendships - they have to go to my church, they have to have the same-age kids, I have to like their husband, they can't be in a different life stage, they have to be on the same page spiritually, they have to have the same interests.   All of these parameters limit the gift of grace we might receive.   (I’ve had people tell me these things. . . you like to shop, I don’t . . . you like TV, I don’t . . .you like . . . .you get the idea.  But I also like talking . . . really talking . . .sharing our hearts, praying, encouraging.  I’ve been “blown off” because I wasn’t like someone else.)

4.     I CANNOT be friends with everybody.  What?  Is that right?  God says I must be friendly, but it is impossible to be true friends with everyone.  I have been told that because my husband is a pastor, I should be friends with everyone.  I can’t.  Period.  And, quite frankly, no one can.  I should be friendly to everyone (as should EVERY Christian).  I should show love and compassion to everyone (as should EVERY Christian).  These things I MUST do.  Period.

 

5.      There are times in my life that I will not have a heart friend.  God knows.  When it comes down to it, God is ALL I need.  I’ve learned this through times of trial . . . infertility, adoptions, ministry issues, financial struggles, etc. 

 

Sometimes the way is lonely
And steep and filled with pain
So if your sky is dark and pours the rain, then
Cry to Jesus
Cry to Jesus
Cry to Jesus and live!

 I’m grateful for the friends God has graced me with through the years!  I pray I always remember that they are a gift of grace and each so very special!

17 years ago . . .

June 3, 2012 . . . 17 years of marriage . . . thinking back to June 3, 1995 . . . 2:00pm . . . hearing the wedding march . . . walking down the aisle . . .one hour later I was Mrs. John Jewers.  Was I ready to be married?  Were we prepared for life together? NO, but God knew what he was doing better than we did.  I have been so blessed to have John’s love, support, care, help, guidance, prayer, encouragement, etc. over the last 17 years.  Do I deserve it?  Mostly, no! J  I am not the easiest person to live with (be shocked!) J  It just reminds me of another’s love that I do not deserve.  God sees me to my core.  He knows every evil thing in me.  Yet, He loves me!!  My small brain cannot even fathom this concept, but my heart responds with joy, praise, worship, humility and quite often a WOOHOO!!!!!!

When I realized that our anniversary was on a Sunday, I was, quite frankly, disappointed.  This is our busiest day of the week, and John’s attention has to be focused elsewhere.  Refreshingly, this was an amazing day.  How better to spend the day than worshipping the God that created us, gave us each other, and keeps us together?  Church was AWESOME, communion was a great time of reflection, and fellowship with other believers was uplifting.  Friends took the kids for the afternoon so John and I could have some time alone.  John took me to Texas Roadhouse for a delicious lunch.  He bought me a KEURIG!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!  My kids gave us homemade cards.  Alana had been thinking about our anniversary since April, and had worked every day to make us a card for each day.  My heart is so full that I feel like a blubbering idiot!  I can’t put my words in any form or poetic order.  I’m so humbled and thankful and overwhelmed and BLESSED!